Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Meanwhile....
I think I have applied to more jobs in the past couple of weeks than I have in my whole life. That's what happens when you get desperate. Sadly enough, there are only so many you can apply for. I mean, hey, its you and everybody else that is without a job these days. You and everybody else that has been laid off are competing for the same jobs. My faith remains, although not always strong, that I will soon have a job. Meanwhile, I am discovering being happy in what I do have. I don't have a job, but I have a family and a home. I don't have much money, but I have music, T.V. (although I am still teaching myself how to watch it without feeling like a complete bum), games that I can play with my daughter, crafts and hobbies around the house, friends that come and visit, and certainly a lot of chores that need to get done. Today I practiced doing these things and being content. Although not always easy, I had to constantly tell myself that it is only for a season. That this too shall come to pass. I try to imagine myself being happily married and getting things done while my husband and child are away. That I need to hurry up and have things done so I can run and get in the shower before the loves of my life arrive. Doing this helps me to get things done with more joy. Even if it is "make believe", it motives me and gives me hope. Perhaps its the dreamer in me. The one I always deny being. The one that at the end of the day looks in the mirror and says "Girl, who do you think you are fooling?"
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